Backpacking analogy

I just had a thought that my working and studying and interviewing and all the things I’m doing to get back into tech is a lot like a really long backpacking trip through steep mountain passes. I think I am at the crest of whatever climb I am on, only to discover that the top of your hill leads to another, steeper hill. I am still making the miles, some days slowly, some days at a break-neck pace, but I am going forward.  Sometimes I have to stop and rest. Sometimes I have to backtrack to get water. Sometimes I have to take a day off to rest in a beautiful little canyon with a magical swimming hole to remind myself this is all worth it. Some days I yell “FUUUCCCCKKK MEEEE!” and I don’t stop no matter what the pain. I’m lonely, I’m scared, I’m so very tired. I am also proud of myself. I am also stronger than I’ve felt in a while. I am also learning so much and growing so much. Pretty much every day, no matter what kind of day it is, I get to have a moment where I say “yes! goddamnit, yes!”

I get to be an artist and a programmer. I get to be a mother and have a career. I choose both. It’s a juggle and I choose it. I choo choo choose it.

My life is a windy path for sure, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. OK well, I should probably be worshipped and adored more than I am, but fine, whatever. I can live with it.


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