I was folding laundry on our bed and Juniper got up on the bed. “Blanket?” so I tucked her in. “Mommy night-night too. Snugglie, please?” I complied, how could I turn her down? When we got all settled in under the comforter, she said “Mmmmmmm, good.” and fell asleep.
What a great day! The St Johns Bizarre was a lot of fun and I actually sold a fair amount of stuff. Thanks to everyone for coming out. I think I’ll be doing more fairs in the future. Juniper and Tom hung out with me for quite a while in the morning which was super cool. And after we broke everything down we went for a nice pizza and pint across the street. The parade was HUGE! It went on for over two hours, close to two and a half. I was one row back so I didn’t get to see much of it but I got a peak at the pirates. Every High School and Middle School marching band in the greater Portland area was there.
The view from my table
Dad and Juniper watching the parade
My bee houses
I’ll have necklaces, cards, tote bags, and mason bee houses for sale at this year’s St Johns Bizarre in St Johns, Portland Oregon. Come on down! All but the glass beads are related to pollinating insects.
St Johns Bizarre
Saturday May 12th, 2012
10:00 AM until 7:00 PM
stjohnsbizarre.com/
2012 will mark The St. Johns Bizarre’s sixth year of creating a forum for neighbors and friends to celebrate our community. We hope to display all that our community has to offer. The Bizarre is a showcase of the unique and eclectic character of North Portland. Included is local music, street performers, a vendor’s market, sausage, pizza, a Bier Garten, kids art activities, and a close proximity to all the wonderful business located in our town center.
I got this new amazing book: Rustic Italian Food By Marc Vetri and David Jouaquim. I had to try the brined pork shoulder recipe immediately. It was delicious. The recipe is a shaved pork shoulder with plums and cantaloupe. And even though it is far from plum season, we lucked out with a delicious cantaloupe so there was enough sweetness in the dish to pull it off. I’m trying this again when it’s plum season.
The finished pork
The finished salad
I served it alongside a cold asparagus salad. Fresh asparagus, lightly steamed and shocked in ice water, tossed with lemon, olive oil, salt and pepper, topped with parmigiano reggiano.
Also from the book, I made some fresh strawberry jellies
The cookies are from one of my favorite recipes on Epicurious. Fudgy Meringue Cookies
Truffle salt focaccia.
All was served with our homemade pinot noir and raspberry dessert wine.
But the most delicious dishes of the evening were these two:
And the best dinner guests are the ones who bring amazing flowers.
I’ve been creating my own diet. I started with a juice fast, but honestly, I don’t want to go that far. I need a little bit of sustenance. So I have steel cut oats for breakfast. Then juice, fruits and veggies throughout the day and rice crackers. Dinner I have some protein. It’s going pretty good. I think this is day nine. I haven’t lost much weight but I’m starting to feel different. I discovered I need yogurt or kefir in my diet too so maybe that’s lunch. I’ve missed lunch. I still allow myself a little alcohol and I’m still drinking my morning coffee. I want to loose 40 pounds and I want this diet to be doable. I really do love my morning coffee. I feel like I can do this indefinitely. Feels good to have a plan I can stick to. I feel hungry but other than that I feel good.
Still chugging away at stuff for the St Johns Bizarre on Saturday May 12th. I’m falling behind. It’s going to be a busy weekend.
I’m being kind to myself these days. I’m eating really healthy. I’m eating less. I’m trying to ride my bike more. I’m not putting pressure on myself to earn money. I’m not stressing about money. I’m consuming less all around, or at least trying to.
I gardened this weekend. Planted Pak Choi, Collards, Green beans and Sugar Snap Peas. Lots of green things this summer for me.
There is a time to be fierce, to push and fight to get somewhere. And there is a time to take a breath and slow down. I’m smelling the flowers right now.
This post has had a thousand titles in my head: “Taking the leap,” “Not taking the leap,” “We’re mad as hell and we’re not going to take it anymore,” “Defeated,” Baby Steps,” “Jumping off a cliff,” “Sitting down,” “Stepping back,” “Screw you, Universe,” “My Glass has exactly 50% of it’s contents.” Whatever. It’s whatever. That’s what I should call it… Whatever.
I have narrowed down all of my problems into two main categories:
1. I don’t have enough money
2. I’m too fat
When I boiled down my problems into such tiny sentences, they seemed less overwhelming. So yeah. What to do. I could talk in circles about how I started the necklaces because I hoped they’d bring in enough extra cash every month so that I could concentrate on my Art with a capital “A.” And I could talk about how when that didn’t work, I decided to start taking small website projects so I could get some money coming in and be more free to work on my Art with a capital “A.” But as we know, or maybe we don’t know… All the money I made from the last two projects was completely wiped out by Mississippi’s surgery, and then some.
Well that sucks. I feel like I’m trying to run up a landslide. And so, I’m going to sit down. I’m going to stop fighting my way up a hill I’m never going to get on top of. Breath…. breath…. Time to figure things out. The good news is, I have a whole lotta art supplies and a craft show in one month. I have enough for the show now. So, I’m going to focus on making stuff to bring to the show. No expectations on selling anything, because the last few months have proven to me, there’s no money in my necklaces. Nope, I’m just going to go, have a good time, and hang out with other crafty people, hopefully enjoy some sun, enjoy the Corin Tucker Band and Mo Phillips, and just enjoy the day. What a nice sounding goal. So here I go. Gonna make some stuff, at my leisure, with no pressure, and then I’m gonna put it on a table and hang out for the day.
And did you notice how all of my financial goals revolved around trying to find a way to make more time to make Art? Yeah I noticed that too. So maybe money isn’t as much the issue as the lack of time to make Art. Seriously, if I stopped worrying about getting out of debt, I would be sooooooo happy to do nothing all day but glue popsickle sticks together. And you know what? If I did that, I would make the MOST awesome popsickle stick sculpture. Well, except that I don’t have time. Juniper just needs to get old enough to help me with more with projects.
So… the fat part. Well, I’m going to just keep working on that one. I’m working on it. One day I feel desperate, the next day I am, well, not desperate. It would probably be easier to feel desperate all the time, and that would stop me from ordering pulled pork sandwiches, but that also sounds kinda sucky being desperate all the time. so anyway, I’m not going to make any statements or promises I can’t keep. I’m just going to keep trying. Baby steps, one day at a time, and all the other cliche things you can think of to say about this sort of thing.
Juniper just woke up from her nap and is in her crib singing the ABCs to herself. She’s so cool.
In standard Mississippi fashion she got pissed off at the tube in her nose, pulled it out herself, and demanded food. So we thought we were just going to visit but when we called ahead, they said come get her! She’s home, sleeping on her favorite couch. What a relief to have her home and start trying to get back to normal. Do we have a normal?
I don’t know if that title is very good. We’re only assuming it was a rubber ball from the look of the remains they extracted from Mississippi’s intestines…
So, rewind back to Saturday 4am. Mississippi starts puking. She basically doesn’t stop puking until about 9 that night when we took her to the doggy ER. She would eat a bunch of grass, puke it up, eat more grass, puke it up, repeat. I picked up about 2 cups worth of eaten and regurgitated grass Saturday afternoon from our backyard. She was trying to get something out of her tummy. She didn’t eat or drink anything except for a bite of food in the evening which she immediately threw up. So we took her to Dove Lewis Emergency Animal Hospital in NW Portland Saturday night and they x-rayed her and took blood samples. She was dehydrated but nothing showed up on the x-ray so we decided to play the waiting game and see if whatever it was that was making her sick would clear up on it’s own. They gave her subcutaneous fluids and anti-nausea meds. The fluids are basically pumped under her skin so her body can absorb them over time. Saturday night she got some decent rest but was still not eating and was panting, drooling, clearly still nauseous and not feeling well in general Sunday morning. She just wanted to hide in dark places in the backyard or basement. We took her back in Sunday about noon. They gave her more fluids and anti-nausea meds and we decided to continue to wait and see until Monday morning. Her mood was still about the same. Still a little bit of a waggy tail, still an occasional bark, but clearly not a happy pup.
Waiting at the Doctor
She got a few hour’s rest Sunday night but was feeling bad again by 2am, I nearly took her back in then, but she curled up on the couch and went to sleep so I joined her and waited til the morning. I brought her in at 6am Monday and admitted her for an ultrasound. Sure enough, she had something blocking her intestines so they did surgery about 11. They removed a very large chunk of what looks like thick rubber ball from her small intestines. We visited her last night. She looks terrible. They were hoping she’d be able to come home this morning (Tuesday) but she’s not eating. I went down there and tried to hand feed her but she wouldn’t take it. The Doctor still feels optimistic that she’s recovering well, but she’s giving her food through a tube now. Tom is going to pay a visit tonight after work and see if she’ll eat for him. We’re now hoping she can come home tomorrow.
We don’t know for sure where this rubber piece came from. We think she probably got ahold of it at her doggy daycare on Friday. I think they are generally pretty good at throwing away damaged dog toys there. Our dog is a moron for eating large, inedible objects. I don’t blame them, but at the same time, my heart is breaking. Not to mention what an incredible financial burden this is. I don’t know when I’ll ever be comfortable letting her out of my sights again. I just want my baby back. Please eat Mississippi. We love you and miss you. We want you home.
Post Surgery
This is gross, but this is what they took out of her:
Hi, I’ll be selling jewelry, hand printed cards, and matted archival prints of paintings at the St Johns Bizarre this year. Saturday May 12th. Won’t you join me?
I’m so excited about this new series of work, that I had to just share. This one is steak with mushrooms in dry felt.
I’m both troubled and inspired by this quote from the book Scandinavian Stitches. I think mostly I’m inspired. It makes me take some pressure off myself. Also, I’m a mom artist now, which is quite a different beast than a non-parent artist. I wasn’t expecting that to happen, but now that I’m on the other side, I see very clearly that my world is incredibly different from when before Juniper was born, and forever will be. So that means finding new ways to create.
“If it weren’t for my children, I would probably still be looking for my deep artistic expression. Having children helped me realize that sometimes scratching the surface is enough to find your creative flow.”
Some weeks I have unlimited energy and I can get lots and lots done. Some weeks I have no energy. These weeks usually coincide with Juniper not sleeping well at night. This week, I have energy, but I’m feeling a little deflated. I got a rejection letter, the ads on Craigslist depress me, and i just feel like I’m running in a hamster wheel that’s going nowhere fast. So, I decided it was time for cookies on demand. Last time I made oatmeal cookies, I froze two rolls of dough in parchment paper so they’d be easy to slice up frozen and pop in the oven.
Now I’ve had a couple of cookies, I’m ready to kick ass again.
You know when you use css background images for rollovers but then when the user clicks the button, there’s an annoying outline left around the button? Here’s the fix. http://css-tricks.com/removing-the-dotted-outline/. Outline:0;
My friend Liz is opening a consignment shop for women and children on the corner of Rosa Parks and Interstate in North Portland, Oregon. She’s having an opening party this weekend! Come on down and check it out. Oh, and I designed the website and poster.
button
women’s and children’s consignment
6517 N Interstate
Portland OR
buttonpdx.com
I joined a gym. It’s the West Coast Fitness here in Portland. There’s a steam room, sauna, hydromassage table, s.a.d. light, and tons of cardio and weight machines. The dressing rooms are clean and nice, and I even have a few mommy friends I run into.
You know what one of the best things about the gym is? I can take a shower and wash my hair without some lecherous toddler coming in to ogle my breasts or throw library books into the water. And I can sit in the steam room and just breath, just me. It feels like such a luxury.
They have daycare too! That was one of the big draws. I’m getting Juniper slowly used to it. She’s gone for 15 minutes (total melt down), then 30 (not melted down but close) and today for 15, I decided to scale back to 15 until she has a few successful experiences, then work my way up to 30 and 45 minutes.
As a newish mom, I can’t tell you how incredible it feels to be going to the gym. So anyway, yay gym.
The new House of Bagels site is live! I partnered with Singlebound Creative to convert the existing site into a custom WordPress site for easier maintenance by the client.
We added a nice jquery slideshow widget: Skitter slideshow to showcase items on the homepage.
Mississippi is now the proud owner-dog of her very own toddler. This toddler loves to share any and all food with her. Mississippi is such a gracious guest, she doesn’t turn down a thing, even things she normally isn’t interested in, like oranges and fruit in general. She’s acquired a taste for bananas and all sorts of fruit. We were skimping on her dog food a bit but I guess we weren’t skimping on it enough. She now weights 48.5 lbs. I’m embarrassed to even say that out loud. She’s three pounds up from last year and 9 pounds up from when we got her three years ago. I’m ashamed. It’s time to get serious. So Mississippi also has a New Years resolution this year. Her doctor doesn’t want us to kick her out of the dining room, so we’re going to cut back her breakfast and dinner from 1 cup to half a cup. OK Mississippi! It’s time to get serious!
It’s been a little over a week of new resolutions. Things are going good.
I’m eating *almost* vegan. I am still eating chicken stock. I had some brie. Oh, Saturday I had a hangover and had eggs and bacon 
. I’ve still been putting milk in my coffee. Other than that, I’ve been doing really good staying away from most animal products. And it’s paying off. I’ve lost a couple pounds.
I wanted to average 10,000 steps a day but last week I actually managed more. Here’s my fitbit progress report:
The stretching I’m not doing so good with. I’m stretching but there’s no rhyme or reason to when or how I do it. Gotta work on that one.
I’d like to fit into my wedding dress by summer. And I’d like to fit back into Tom’s jeans so I can start stealing them again.